Parenting is one of the hardest experiences you’ll ever go through in life. If it isn’t the hardest, it ranks pretty far up there considering it’s an ongoing experience that doesn’t end when your child turns 18. Even though the hardest years of parenting might be behind you at that point, you’ll still have those late nights where your daughter calls you because she and her boyfriend just broke up. You’ll still have excruciatingly painful experiences, as well as moments of the purest kind of joy when your son or daughter gets married, or you see your grandchild for the first time.
Parenting is everything but easy, but it also holds some of the greatest rewards that life has to offer. As a parent, you’ve probably questioned whether or not you’re doing a good job. It’s a hard question to ask yourself, because if the answer is no, that affects how your child lives the rest of their life. If you’re not quite sure where you rank, here are ways you can know you’re doing a good job raising your children:
You Know Your Kid
A parent who is doing a good job at raising their child knows their child on an intricate level. Often better than the child knows themselves. If you know what your child does when they’re happy and when they’re sad, if you know what to look for to show that they’re struggling, you’re steps ahead of a lot of other parents in the world who are too focused on themselves to really know and nurture and love their own children. If you know your kid’s favorite color or the reason that they love the snow, you’re doing great because you love with your whole being.
You Don’t Feel the Need to Know Everything
All children will choose not to tell their parents things, but that doesn’t mean that they’re making bad decisions that are clothed in secrecy. It’s natural that as your child gets older, there will be events in their life that they don’t need to tell you about in detail. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent.
On the contrary, if you can be at peace with the fact that your children don’t feel the need to tell you everything, but you also know that they’re not lurking around in secrecy keeping things from you, you’re doing alright. A parent who’s done well has a child who knows that they can come to them when they feel the need and the parent won’t pry for information they don’t want to give. Chances are good that if your kid is doing well, they’ll want to talk.
You Trust Your Children’s Choices
A child grows into the kind of person that their mother and father are. Many make oaths that they won’t be like their father and mother, but when they do that, they start emulating the very characteristics they despise. You know you’ve done a good job raising your child if you can trust their choices. You don’t’ have to worry about them going to a party or being around drugs because you know that you raised them to make educated decisions. The whole idea of knowing whether or not you’re a good parent is loaded, of course. Everybody has good things they’ve done, and bad. What matters in the end is that you keep a good relationship and you learn to love, forgive, and apologize.